OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
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