I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
Randomize
