guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
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