is your mom at the bar?
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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