Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
We need a shit load of segways right now
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize