operation have a gay friend backfired
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize