i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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