Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I smell stomach acid.
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize