I need help removing her.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
