you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
