did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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