Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.