when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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