My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
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