Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.