those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I think I sprained my soul last night
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
