ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
