Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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