There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Is it because I queefed?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
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