U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize