So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
