My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize