This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
