Betty ford says i'm here all night
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
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