when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize