I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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