i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Randomize
