Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
