I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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