i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
