I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize