Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM VODKA MAN
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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