she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
