suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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