something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it penis luge time yet?
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
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