PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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