you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Randomize
