i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
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