Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
a search helicopter?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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