New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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