why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
