He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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