He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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