just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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