They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Randomize
