just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize