Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
P.S. I can't hear my feet
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
