Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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