People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Randomize
