You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
