were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I feel like abortions should bother me more
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was a trapeze. enough said
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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