I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
